This is going to be very short and not formatted (yet?) and contain no GIFs (and I say it like Jif, in case anyone cares - probably because I love peanut butter)...but I am literally trying to do this and pack my bags for a trip to Spokane all at the same time.
Plus there's some kind of funky zucchini casserole in my fridge that I don't want to eat and I can't stop thinking about it, because I so badly want to clean the casserole dish.
Um, anyway...
I wrote a novel about a slightly depressed geneticist from Missouri who unexpectedly lands herself in an undercover operation to bust a crime syndicate in Seattle. It was based in part on my own experiences a) as a geneticist and b) trying to become an FBI agent.
Want to know how the latter went down? I applied online, got selected to take a written test in Kansas City, "passed" said test, met with an agent in Jefferson City who administered a physical fitness exam (for which I had been training my booty off for months), passed said exam, and was wait-listed for the Dallas interview phase. If I passed the interview, I would have taken a polygraph, undergone an extensive background check, and then, potentially, been sent to Quantico.
Instead, while I was on the wait list, BAM. Federal hiring freeze of 2010. Go figure.
Anyway, after that I did lots of other stuff in my field, like catching mountain lions, tracking woodpeckers, trying the Peace Corps (and failing), being a geneticist some more, hanging out in a Honduras jungle, and then landing some jobs with state wildlife management agencies.
I now work for the state of Montana. And my job is SUPER DUPER BUSY like whoa.
But I still find time to write. And I love it. I love my day job, and I get to fly around in helicopters and little planes counting mountain goats, deer, elk, and gray wolves (there are tons of pics on Twitter). Unfortunately, I also have to attend public meetings and negotiate/administer changes to hunting regulations, drive to my regional headquarters ALL THE TIME for staff meetings, talk to residents who have wildlife problems (some of which can be really silly), pick up the occasional dead deer, and give hunters advice on where to go. Oh, and then my bighorn sheep herd got pneumonia, so I have to deal with that now.
I'm sort of a Leslie Knope of the wildlife world. LOCAL GOVERNMENT FTW.
But as a mentee, I will work my booty off. Just like I worked my booty off training for the FBI. I am so excited about this story, and I'm having so much fun with it, but I also know I could benefit from some experienced eyes. I entered #PitchWars last year with a fantasy story that I still love - I was unsuccessful landing a mentor, but I still had a blast and met some great people.
OK, I seriously need to go pack.
